A busy morning getting back in to the groove of regular malls hours, found me driving Abi to school, rushing home to say goodbye to Evan as he skateboarded his way to school. As I finished my hair and makeup, I listened to my Specials CD and took a little trip to yesteryear.
I felt as thought I was a really "cool" chick in my post high school days. The year was 1983 and I was still kind of a punk; bright, opinionated, "happening". I was at OU taking classes in Classical Music Performance, and attending classes at OCC to get those grades to prove to OU I could be something other than a non- matriculating student. ( I couldn't take academics, only music because the high school grades weren't so hot).
I had a straight 4.0 in all of my classes.
I was about to throw it all away for " the love of my life". And did.
I envisioned a marriage where I would be an individual, and pursue my art. 'Twas not to be however.
In a desire to be adult, I traded it in for a wedding dress in 1986 and eventually a family. I thought my kids would be individuals just like me. I home schooled them for this reason for several years. I always looked at public school education as a warehousing of minds. Several of my teacher friends have confirmed this. There is one way to teach and if your kid isn't that type of learner well tough crap for them.
I looked at education as an adventure and wished my kids would develop the same love for learning I did while in college.
My daughter and I took books out at the library and studied Egyptology. She made up her own hieroglyphics, and read how they made mummies. ( She was 5)
Evan learned about vacuums by putting a jar over a candle and watching it go out,
( he was 4) and discovered how a vacuum was an absence of oxygen. We were part of a home school group that met bi-weekly to give supplemental classes at Grace church in Detroit. I taught basic piano and music theory. It was all voluntary.
When taking them to the Detroit Institute of Arts, many onlookers were astonished to hear Abi stand up in the double stroller and proclaim " Ooo, look Mommy; Van Gogh, post impressionism!" I could teach with a perspective of Christianity also, that while not for everyone, was for me. I also didn't feel like leaving my kids Christianity to the church entirely either. My brother is gay. My church said it was a sin. I said my church could kiss my butt!
My ex husband thought I was making the kids "weird", so we went back and forth about home schooling. When it was clear that he intended on divorcing me, the kids were sent to public school. Abi was happy, she likes having friends around. Evan, more the pragmatist, said " home school was better" because school was often over at 1:00 or 2:00 leaving more time for the drums.
So suffice to say, I was a rebel. I intended to guide my kids through life by molding their minds to be accepting of others and to pursue their interests. It must have worked, They're both musical, they take photos and dress like little punks. Abi is part of the Diversity Club at school, they love and accept their gay "uncles", and they hang out with me in Ferndale and my tatooed, cussing, smoking, drinking, LOVING "family"
The "Me" I envisioned so long ago is alive and well, living in the 80's perhaps, but looking at the kids I have, I try not to break my arm, patting myself on the back.
( the picture isn't me by the way, but I wish it was!)
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